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What to do when you’re jealous of your friends.

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I had an interesting moment last weekend when I caught up with a friend I hadn’t seen in a few months, not intentionally – just life. I’d felt we hadn’t connected much in quite a while but didn’t think much of it as I know friendships cycle in and out quite a bit and things get in the way.

After chatting away she said to me ‘I’ve been really jealous of people lately, including you.” My response was something along the lines of “Huh? Me? Wtf you crazy cat?”

After talking and unravelling what was really going on, she said that she was super happy for me and all I’ve been doing, and it wasn’t so much that she was jealous of me, it was more that she was pissed off at herself for not doing the things she really wanted to be doing whilst I was getting out there and just doing them!

Interesting… I didn’t expect it at all, especially not from a friend! And it really got me thinking a lot about jealousy.

I know for a lot of us ‘lightworkers’ and woman who choose to ‘shine their light’, something that we are afraid of is outshining others and making them feel bad. It’s something I’ve always struggled with too, although I’m frign happy to admit that I have finally just let that shit go for good. Why? Because our purpose here is to shine our light and wake others up to theirs too. And how the shit will we ever do that if we are tip-toeing around waiting for everyone to be happy and ok with it? I sure as hell ain’t waiting….

So what’s the deal with this jealousy thing and what can you do about it?

Jealousy is a manifestation of our soul’s frustration in not allowing it to create what it desires.

Just read that line again. And again. And again.

I’m guessing if you’re like me (Yah – I get jealous sometimes too, I ain’t no Guru!), it’s usually triggered by social media. Having a cheeky scroll and seeing the highlight reel of others and then letting our Ego’s run wild thinking that their life rocks and ours sucks because they have sooooooo much more than we do. Which for most of the time, is total BS. This little trick is how our ego keeps us feeling ‘less than’ others, and keeps us feeling separate and disconnected from them. We instantly place others higher up on a shiny pedestal and tell ourselves a story that they are better than us. We then feel small, shitty, unworthy and powerless. Sound familiar?

We then question ourselves – ‘What do they have that I don’t? What’s wrong with me?’

Maybe right now you have someone in mind that you are jealous of? Is it their body, their health, their travels, their job, their number of followers? Pin point exactly what it is (if anything), and ask yourself – well what is this actually about?

Is your Ego once again looking for a distraction to keep you from being happy and at peace now? Are you looking for something to stop you from celebrating your own achievements? Maybe it’s “OMG I’ve lost 5kg I feel amazing!’… Followed by “But I’m still not as good as her…. Or but I still don’t have XYZ.” Or “I’m still sooooo far away”

It’s like the moment we celebrate ourselves, our Ego will go looking for comparison to keep us in check and from truly being proud of ourselves. It’s horseshit. And kinda funny.

So notice when the jealousy arises and catch yourself out in the act. Use it as an opportunity to tune in with whats really happening for you.

Ask yourself – is what they have REALLY what I want, or is it just what I think I want?

So often we look at others and say ‘I wish I had that..’ but is it actually what YOU want? Is it in alignment with YOU? For example, I used to always think I wanted a massive shiny mansion and would get jealous of people with huge houses and a pool. But then one day I asked myself, “Do I actually want that, or do I just think I want that?” And I realised that my version of abundance and a ‘mansion’ is simply a cute country house with a big garden and wooden floorboards and a bath. Done deal for me. It was always just my ego saying that what I truly wanted wasn’t ‘big” enough.

And hey – if it IS what you really want in your heart, then use them as inspiration to get the heck moving and create it for yourself too!

There is no room to compare when you too are creating.

When you get shitty at someone rocking their stuff – ask yourself where are YOU feeling disconnected from your creativity, your passion, your joy? Where are YOU deeply unsatisfied but not admitting to yourself? Where are YOU pissed off because YOU keep holding yourself back and procrastinating? Where are YOU letting fear plan your party?

Because the truth us, jealousy is never about them – it’s about YOU. Get real with yourself, and then get in your power and get moving girlllll.
Also, here’s a biggggggg tip for ya – When you see someone with something that you wish to create, or are in the process of creating – thank them. Bless them. Send them love. Let it be a wink from the Universe that yours is in the works too and you’re getting warmer. The moment you start judging another for what you want, is the moment where you push it further away from yourself. You are literally blocking yourself from creating it too because you confuse the heck out of the Universe – one second you want it, and then when someone else has it you hate on them. You be trippin’!

So when the jealousy arises, check in and practice radical self-awareness and compassion. Let your jealousy teach you, and let it take you further into expansion.

Let it shake you and wake you to turbo boost you into your own creation and inspired-action.

Oils to support femininity, self-love, PMS, hormone balancing, anxiety + radiant skin

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Over the past 5 months I have been incorporating pure high vibin’ doTERRA essential oils into my self-care and spiritual practices. What I am noticing bigtime with my friends, clients and women in general at the moment is the need for serious self-care, support, nourishment, slowing down and deeper heart connection.

Whether you are consciously aware of it or not, the collective energy is changing (you may have noticed yourself experiencing heightened anxiety, cray cray thoughts, feeling ‘off’ and not knowing why, more tired than usual, feeling more emotional and not being able to control it? – Yah things are shifting, hang in there!) and in these times we need extra support. Not just physically, emotionally and mentally, but also energetically whilst we transition through these changes and upgrades. 

This heavily masculine way of being isn’t working out so much for us anymore. We’ve become unbalanced and very do-do-do, go-go-go, scroll-scroll-scroll that we are  so up in our head that we’ve become disconnected from our bodies and more importantly disconnected from our feelings. These oils help us open our senses, connect with our true feelings, keep our vibration high and strong, and help shift us back into alignment. 

I’ve listed the oils that I’m currently loving that are supporting me into greater levels of body awareness, non-toxic self-care, connection, slowing the shit down and awakening my femininity.


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—- > Here’s what I want to make clear – the oils choose YOU. They come into your life for a reason at exactly the right moment that you are open to receiving them. The one’s you resonate with and feel most drawn to are moving towards you for a reason. They are here to support and assist you into balance and energetic alignment (and a high vibration state) so that your body can work it’s own healing miracles. Please always trust your intuition and let the oils work with you. These are just my suggestions and recommendations from my own personal experience, always listen to your own body – it’s knows what’s up!


Oils to support our monthly cycles and tone down ze PMS (can I get a hellllls yeah!)

Do you have the monthly feels of ‘great – got my frign period again’. I’m noticing that many women are holding a lot of shame, embarrassment, and judgement around their monthly cycles. Wouldn’t it be sweet if we started shifting that energy and embracing our cycles, and working with them to slow down, go within, soften and actually frign feel, rather than try and turbo our way through all the time when our bodies are screaming out for self-care, stillness and nourishment.

So if you are very heavily in your masculine (most of us are these days but we are slowly starting to balance, yay!) then these 2 oils will absolutely help you balance and awaken your beautiful feminine energy!

14689314_10154067441043613_1233768244_o+ ClaryCalm – I cannot speak more highly of this oil! Our very own women’s blend for women experiencing irregular or lack of cycle, hormonal breakouts, extra heavy flow or ridiculous cramping/bloating/gas. known as ‘The Oil of Vulnerability’ because it supports us during our most sensitive and emotional time of the month, and through our transition into menopause.

Until I started teaching oils classes, I never realised just how disconnected we have become from our natural cycles, to the point where some women feel gross and embarrassed just speaking about it. They legit HATE on it, and to me that’s got to change and I truly hope that this oil lands in the palms and on the wombs of all woman to support our cycles and clear the blocks we have to fully embracing it.

ClaryCalm can help naturally balance your hormones, regulate your cycles, ease PMS (cramping, hormonal breakouts at that time of the month, bloating) and helps balance us emotionally around this time when we want to curl up in a ball and cry on the couch all day. And night. Clary Calm is a blend of Clary Sage, Lavender, Bergamot, Roman Chamomile, Cedarwood, Ylang Ylang, Geranium, Fennel, Carrot, Palmarosa, and Vitex and it comes in a roller bottle so it’s easy to apply a swipe each morning and night.

Whisper – One word; divine. Actually two words; divine feminine. This oil will replace your perfume and I guarantee you won’t go back. It is the blend for femininity, and wearing it will help you balance your masculine and feminine energy. If you’ve been rejecting your femininity and not accepting that beautiful, natural, creative part of yourself – than this is your oil to start to embrace and awaken it.

Oils for hormonal balancing and reducing stress levels 

As well as your ClaryCalm;

Geranium – This beauty in a bottle helps stimulate the adrenal cortex – which assists with balancing and regulating our hormones, as well as relieving anxiety and stress relief. This is a gentle oil that can be used with bubba’s too. Geranium helps us trust, forgive, open  up, and is a Queen oil for healing the heart.

Lavender and Lavender Peace (blend) will support you in keeping your anxiety and stress levels as low as can be.. The go-to oils for calming and relaxation. 

Clary Sage – Assists endometriosis, PMS, emotional stress, cramps.  Rub a couple drops into the abdomen for menstrual pain, apply to soles of feet to balance the hormones. Clary Sage also helps you open your mind and imagination to see things clearer and from a higher perspective.

Oils to ease Anxiety/Overwhelm/Fear/Scatter-brain

(more…)

Are you freakin’ out about not knowing your purpose?

Some of my clients over the last week have been asking me how I found my ‘purpose’. It seems that a lot of people are worried that they don’t know what their true purpose is yet, and have a sense of sadness that if they don’t discover it in the next 2 weeks then they are doomed. They get anxious when people ask ‘So, where do you see yourself in 12months, 2 years, 10 years?’ and they don’t really know the answer. (Or the answer scares them because they sure as hell don’t want it to be the same as where they are now but they don’t know what to do about it!) Cue frustration, comparison, over-analysing, and a couple freaking-the-shit-out moments, especially when you see other people rocking it in their flow zone and you wonder why you don’t feel that fired up about things like they do.

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So let me share a couple of steps from my experience of ‘finding my purpose.’

Step 1 – Follow your freakin’ heart. And first up, this means that you’ve actually got to get to know what your heart wants. Like really wants. Not what you think it wants (aka what your head tells you that you ‘should’ do). Not what your parents want, or your friends, or your dog, or your neighbour – but what YOUR heart wants. You’ve got to do the inner work, but the truth is that most of us already know what we want to do, but we don’t want to admit it to ourselves because we are scared of what might happen if we fully owned it… maybe you won’t be the ‘cool cat’ anymore and will have to put yourself out there in places that you’ve judged others for being in the past. Gasssssp!

Step 2 – Let go of the ‘how it should look’ shit. I’ve always had an inner calling to teach, but never as a school teacher, and for a while that frustrated the crap outta me because if I wasn’t a school teacher then how the bloody heck would I teach? After doing my own inner work and letting go of a lotttt of stuff, and in figuring out how to unapologetically do step 1 – it started unfolding very quickly. You will always be guided – if you take the time to listen and stop getting in your own way! I randomly felt the call to start a blog on my 22nd birthday. None of my friends were blogging and I didn’t even know what a blog was, but I just felt the call to start and decided I would figure it out as I went. A year later I randomly landed on a website and before I could even think twice I had enrolled into a course to become a Life Coach, even though at the time I didn’t even know what a Life Coach was. Looking back now, that course was the foundation for me to become a teacher. A teacher in my own way, by my own rules.

I now teach woman how to follow their hearts, shake a few of their old limits and excuses up, and teach them to start living their purpose too. I don’t teach in a school – I teach through my writing and my videos. I teach through workshops, I teach through online courses, I teach about Essential oils, and I will soon be teaching Kundalini Yoga. Each of these stepping stones has allowed me to now step into a higher purpose of mine – teaching ‘everyday’ women how to be heart-driven leaders and create change in the World. I mean seriously – do you think I thought it was going to look like this 4 years ago when I was completely lost, studying something because I thought I ‘should’ and being very far from being connected to my heart – HELL NO. Which leads me to…

Step 3 – Stay open and surrender. The truth is that you actually already know. Seriously, you do. You know the answers, but you let your head judge them, think they aren’t ‘good enough’, compare them to others, worry what people will think, or feel guilty for wanting what you really want. You already know you are here to be more then a blob, and to make a difference in other peoples lives in some way. And if you didn’t know that yet, then I just reminded you. Your purpose doesn’t need to be on a World stage in front of everyone – some people’s purpose will be to be out on stage and and some people’s won’t be. There is no difference (although your Ego will try to convince you that there is) and there absolutely is no ‘but their’s is better so mine sucks and isn’t really that good so I won’t bother’. I call BS hard on that one.

Step 4 – Meditate on your purpose. Visualise yourself serving at your full capacity. Meditate on you beaming in your absolute element – and hey, the vision you get back may surprise you. What are you doing? How do you feel? Who is there? Don’t judge it, and sure as hell don’t block it by your mind being all ‘as IF you could do that, who are you kidding mate?’ Set the intention to be open to receiving, to be open to seeing yourself in a new way. Let go of limited self-perceptions and let your heart lead on this one. Ask for guidance, stay open and you will always receive.

Step 5 – Remember that when you take away all the labels and bright-lights, your ultimate purpose is joy. Teaching, speaking, seeing others shine, speak up and honour their hearts – THAT brings my soul the most joy, and I’ll never stop. It might keep evolving, and how it ‘looks’ on the outside might change, but this is my zone. Why? Because it’s where I feel most joyful, passionate, connected to my heart, most in service and most ME.

Step 6 – Stop letting shitty excuses convince you that you can’t do what you’re here to do. Money is an easy excuse from your Ego to keep you from following your heart and living your purpose. Not having enough time is an excuse. Not knowing enough is an excuse. Worrying that you might lose friends over it is an excuse. You either find an excuse or you find a way. Divorce all the silly stories keeping you away from who you are here to be.

Your purpose will find you when you just be YOU.

So take a chill pill, rock out as you, and soon enough you’ll find yourself leading a tribe of hundreds in what feels like the blink of an eye with people’s hearts cracking open right before your very eyes.  Just sayin’.

One last thing that I want you to know is that the most powerful thing you can be when finding your purpose is OPEN, and the most powerful place you can live when looking for your purpose is in the NOW.

So are you open, now?

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